Contentment Part II: Extreme Measures

I often pride myself on being a fairly observant person, especially in social situations. Unfortunately, I've missed a few things and when I have, they've been huge, obvious, screaming-to-be-noticed things. I worked with a girl once who was severely bulimic and terribly ill. I didn't know this until years after I quit that job, when word got around that she was checking herself into a rehab clinic after getting down to 70 lbs. We were pretty close, not best friends or anything, but I probably should've noticed and said something. I'm a naturally thin person and I don't particularly like when people mistake my large appetite for an eating disorder, so I try not to point any fingers, you know? She took advantage of how oblivious I was and would always majorly binge eat during our time together. The most memorable experience I had with her was one night when we watched movies together. Within two hours of watching some Katherine Heigl movie, she ate a family-sized bag of tator tots, two cheeseburgers, 10 chicken nuggets (we were suppose to share those), three chocolate croissants and a gallon of birthday cake ice cream. A gallon. She excused herself promptly after eating to use the restroom. I don't remember what was going on in my life to distract me from recognizing a fairly obvious problem, but at the time my best friend was also hiding a heroin addiction right under my nose so it must've been good. Anyway, I don't share this to exploit her story or make light of a very sad and real illness. It's just always stuck with me as an extreme example that we often get it wrong. I don't judge her, and I hope you don't either. I simply recognize her brokenness and realize I get it wrong too. Instead of enjoying something for what it is, I grasp onto it and shake it empty like a coin jar, trying to obtain something it can't offer. I binge on material items, on sleep, on work, on beauty, on attention, on anything really. None of these things are bad in moderation, in healthy amounts. They instantly become a problem when we make them god and want them to satisfy us. (I'll skip over the part where I try to put a new spin on an old topic. Timothy Keller covers this better than I ever could in his book Counterfeit Gods and I highly recommend reading and absorbing it.) My not-so-ground-breaking advice if you find yourself binging on things in search of contentment, is to severely cut it out of your life. At least for a while. Jesus created this concept when he said: "If your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out." Matthew 18:9 Probably hyperbole, but I think his point is that we shouldn't be afraid to take extreme measures to flee from our sin. A few years back, I realized I always had the tv on. I usually wasn't even watching it, I just wanted noise in the background and distraction. Instead of making an agreement with myself to only watch it on certain nights or at certain times, I sold my tv and canceled my cable. My roommate wasn't thrilled, but our house was filled with books, laughter and conversation instead of Roseanne reruns and the Food Network. My prayer life was loud. My loneliness evaporated, even in a now-quiet house. This is a long-winded post that's probably telling you something you already know: if something is a problem for you, get rid of it. But really. Just do it. Delete your Instagram account if you feel like you're on your phone too much. Chop up your credit card if you go shopping too often. Get out of that relationship you shouldn't be in. Throw away all your junk food. It's not always that easy, and some addictions need professional attention, but sometimes it is that easy. I have experienced great freedom in doing my part and inviting God in to do his part. I'm amazed at how much more success I have when I don't try to reason with myself on something.    Hopefully I've offered you more than the back story of my paranoia that everyone is hiding something from me and you at least got a good book recommendation.  Later this week, Contentment Part III: Remembering.

Contentment Part 1

I start on my New Years resolutions early. Usually around November. I feel like I have more success that way and honestly, I'm usually so sick of myself by that time of year it's pretty easy to start. 

My list looks similar to last year's, and the years before. It probably even looks like yours, if you made one. 
Be more organized, be less messy, exercise more, eat more whole foods, shop less. This year I'm adding "read the Bible straight through chronologically". I've never done it before and my husband bought me a chronological study Bible months ago that had been sitting on my desk until recently. I cracked it open January first and loved it. It has some of the best commentary I've ever read (my version of "best" is probably different than yours; I like it short & simple) and I'm really enjoying it so far. It pointed out something I've never really heard before, or if I have heard it, it didn't stick with me. After the chapter about Eve eating the forbidden fruit, it notes that: 
"Satan helped Eve shift her focus from all that God had done and given to the one thing he had withheld." 
That's a fairly obvious observation, but I guess I had never really phrased it that way. I can really relate to struggling with contentment, can't you? It got me thinking of how many of my sinful tendencies are rooted in being discontent; in the things God has withheld from me. I so quickly measure and record what I don't have, I compare with others and become ungrateful. For example, God blessed me with an amazing, godly husband who loves me despite my neurotic tendencies and yet frequently I find myself zeroing in on how often he leaves his socks around the house and whether or not other husbands do that. This is laughable when I think about all the things he does do (like, stay married to me, for example). That's a lighthearted example, but it's a small version of a fairly big problem. Whether it's not being at the job you want, struggling with infertility, losing an important game or being single, it's easy to fixate on the one thing you don't have instead of all the things you do. 
With this in mind, my true goal for the new year is to find contentment in God alone. To remember what I have, what he's done and who he is, and not shift my focus. Sure, there are tangible things I need to change in order to do that. But designating a specific laundry day in my schedule and losing a few pounds aren't going to truly satisfy me or change me.  


I have to agree with the author that this sin, shifting our focus away from all God has done and can do, is responsible for many, if not all, sins. It bleeds in to everything! I believe that it's why we're overweight, or life-threatening underweight. It's why we have storage units of belongings rotting away. It's why our schedules are exploding. It's why we're obsessed with youth. It's why we border-line exploit ourselves on social media. Because Satan has undermined our contentment. 

In the next couple posts, I'll be suggesting some ways to cultivate joy and contentment in your relationship with God that I've experienced lately. If nothing else, to follow through on my New Year's goal of writing more frequently.