Proverbs 31 for the single woman:

I've been reading through Proverbs one chapter at a time this month, and seeing as how it's October 31st today, I landed on Proverbs 31. If you're familiar with the Bible, you know this one. It gives a pretty specific list detailing what it looks like to be a wife of noble character. It's a great list, but I use to struggle with this chapter. It bothered me that the most detailed account in the Bible of a godly woman is a married woman. (Is the chip on my shoulder showing?)

Since I became Matt's wife, my appreciation for Proverbs 31 has grown. Here's what I wish my 19-year-old-self would've seen in this chapter, despite my marital status:

"Work hard at whatever you're doing, whether this means school, ministry, a part time job or all three. Have the discipline to get up early, eat a good breakfast and start the day out well. Later, you'll appreciate establishing these disciplines. Don't be afraid to work long and hard on something, but don't find your worth in your accomplishments. Have eyes that see the poor and a heart that cares for the needy. Plan ahead. Be proactive to be on time, to meet deadlines and to prepare for the unexpected. Be a good roommate to whoever you're living with. Be a good stewart of the home God has blessed you with, whether this is an apartment, a dorm, a house or your parent's basement. Run with an honorable crowd. Don't date someone with a questionable reputation or who is unknown in your community; a godly man is a well-known and well-liked man. Have a sense of humor and a joyful perspective on things; remember that God is taking care of you and you have nothing to fear. Oppose lazy tendencies. Be a woman who finishes what she starts and follows through on her commitments. And lastly (this needs no revision), charm is deceptive, beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord will be praised."

I still struggle to fit myself into Scripture sometimes. I read verses that call me into the seemingly unattainable. But my mistake there is trying to make the Bible about me instead of making myself about the Bible.

Whatever you read in the Bible, listen up. The more you immerse yourself in God's word with a willing heart, the more able you are to hear from him, no matter who he's speaking to. (Spoiler alert: he's speaking to you.)

An ode to autumn.

Every year, it happens. Women everywhere greet fall like it's the first time it has ever appeared. We trade in our sandals for boots and our sunglasses for scarves. Pumpkin paraphernalia fills the grocery stores. Your house either smells like spiced candles or toasted pumpkin seeds. (Right now, mine smells like both.) Social media is soaked with #pumpkinspicelattes and family pictures from the corn maze. People love fall. I love fall. 

The obvious reasons for this adoration come to mind, like football and candy corn and the kickoff (pun intended) to the holiday season. But today, as my brown boots crunched bright, yellow leaves on the sidewalk, I realized why fall is so especially lovely to me. 

Summer ends and it's a sad thing, especially if you reside in the northwest. Those three months provide the most beautiful, dry, sunny and enjoyable season of our year. Around this time, we say goodbye to the sun until May and a gray blanket covers the sky for months. Luckily, fall eases us in to that. The air turns crisp overnight, trees explode with color and fog gets caught up in the trees. It's beautiful! 

Fall gives us a little glimmer of beauty as summer dies right before our eyes. Our gardens die, but the sparkling layer of frost over the grass appears. Lush, green trees die a slow, colorful death and brighten up our rainy days. 

A month ago, Matt stood at a podium next to his aunt's coffin during her funeral and prayed a hopeful prayer about the life God offers to us, through his death. Meanwhile, our sweet four-month-old sat on my lap sucking his fingers so loudly I almost slipped out to the lobby. After the service, a frail, older woman with tears in her eyes grabbed my arm and smiled. She told me that hearing the sounds of a new baby during a funeral gave her perspective on death. It was beautiful, she said.

Beauty in death. That has the gospel written all over it. It might seem like a stretch, but I think the beauty of fall is hopeful and gospel-like. 

So with fingerless gloves, I raise my mug of cider to you, fall. You make the death of summer so beautiful. Cheers.

Dirty stables.

It's been quiet around here. We are at the tail-end of a very busy four months. In March, Matt and I moved to the Portland area (that's a nice way of saying Vancouver) to be near my family. At the end of May, we welcomed our sweet Taylor Matthew into the world and enjoyed a few quiet weeks together as a new family of three. Then, we enjoyed three months of visitor after visitor, trip after trip, diaper rash after diaper rash. It was a whirlwind of a summer. 

At the beginning of September, we moved! I knew it'd be an adjustment with a newborn, but we were ready. Three days later, we got a call from family in Alabama telling us that Matt's aunt lost her battle with cancer. We dropped everything to fly out there and jumped into funeral-planning, eulogy-writing and morale-boosting. 

Two weeks later, we came home to half-unpacked boxes, bare walls and a few very thoughtful house-warming touches by my parents. We settled in a bit more (plugged in the record player) and unpacked the necessities (the coffee maker), but focused our energy on my best friend's wedding that we were both heavily involved in. 

Life has been wonderfully full. But I'm tired! Breastfeeding, moving, starting a new (very part-time) job, traveling and matron-of-honoring has worn me out. But most of all, our messy, distraught house is driving me crazy. 

This morning, over coffee and a pumpkin poptart, I read this proverb: 

"Without oxen a stable stays clean, but you need a strong ox for large harvest." 

I feel like we have so much stuff and I'll never be able to manage it with a busy calendar and needy baby. I want order. I want the sink to stay free of dishes. 

But when you have ox, you have stables to clean. It's a mark of being blessed. But it comes with work to be done. I'd rather have a busy calendar, a cluttered home and my hands full than be bored and alone. 

I also really like this verse because it implies that there's cleaning to do. Yes, that's part of it; part of having a large harvest. Dishes are the result of having a meal to eat. Loads of laundry are from having a full closet. Heaps of diapers are from having a healthy baby. Having my needs met is a huge blessing that I too often take for granted. 

As we adjust to this season of life, my hope is that I'll manage my time well. But I also hope that I give myself a little grace, and remember that a list of chores and to-dos is really, quite a lovely gift.