I'm reading the book of Philippians this week in order to cheer my soul. I don't necessarily need cheering, but Philippians is my favorite book and I always look forward to the way chapter four revives me. In addition to the encouragement Paul offers in his writing, I've also been brought to my knees with conviction this week. Today I was particularly in awe of Jesus' character illustrated in chapter 2 and thought I would share it.
"Don't be selfish; don't try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others better than yourselves. Don't look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. You must have the same attitude that Christ had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and he died a criminal's death on a cross." Philippians 2:3-8
Jesus didn't cling to power, prestige or privilege. But he submitted to God in obedience. I've noticed myself struggle for position and power in my marriage lately, internally. Thoughts that begin with "I shouldn't have to ___" run rampant in my mind as I cling to my pride.
O, how quick I am to protect my pride. If there is every a doubt of how fabulous I am or how much attention I deserve, I make it known. Whether it's a constant dedication to how I look or how intelligent I sound, or how sincere and deep my faith is, or how well my husband is supposed to love me, I am keeping tabs on it.
So this morning, as I look at who Jesus is, I am humbled. He didn't cling to his authority. He gave up his privileges to humble himself in obedience. This morning my heart deflated in sorrow for my selfish ambition and swelled with great love for our King.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Friday, July 13, 2012
A Reminder
As I've mentioned before, Matt and I are a part of a very small church plant in Ventura. We joined in about 9 months ago when the core team was developing, which also happened to be our second week of marriage. I'm sure we will look back on this time and shake our heads at our decision to be in such a demanding ministry right after being married, but in the meanwhile, we love it. Mostly. Some weeks are hard. Images of me sitting in the back row of some established church drinking their complimentary coffee and enjoying their full-band worship cross my mind often. I love the raw, messiness of church planting; it makes the gospel authentic and personal to me. But at the same time, there are days when being a part of this new ministry leaves me exhausted, doubtful and frustrated.
Yesterday was one of those days. I didn't want to go to our home community; sip on tea, snack on dessert and engage in conversation while personal, intimate details from the lives of our friends are shared. I wanted to open a box of cookies from Trader Joe's and watch a movie with Matt, preferably in sweatpants. Our pastor, sensing our group's lowered morale, had asked a friend of his to join us for the night and share part of his story. He is a fellow church planter in Longbeach, which is known for it's rough-around-the-edges environment. Or to be blunt: for being ghetto. He is a few years ahead of us in the church planting game so he shared with us a few things he's learned. He sat in the middle seat of the L-shaped couch in a living room full of people and while mostly looking at the floor, opened up to us about the things he and his family have been through over the past few years. His stories brought laughter, tears, sympathetic noises and "amens" from almost every person circled up around him. Mostly because it is easy to identify with his experience: church planting is hard. Beyond that, I was moved by his simple yet captivating summary; planting a church is all about Jesus. Ministry is all about Jesus. We should be all about Jesus. Again, the simplicity of it is obvious. And I won't speak for everyone in that room but I feel comfortable assuming that we all felt ministered to by him. It's so easy to be pulled to and fro by the ups and downs of a new ministry, a new group and a new city. It's even easier to start working from within, trying to take control of things and accomplish them yourself.
He had nothing new or flashy to say to us. He wasn't holding a church-planting secret or offering us something we didn't know. He didn't rattle off Scripture or attach his story to men from the Bible. He shrugged, lifted his head and reminded us why we were sitting in that living room in the first place. We love and believe in Jesus and his ability to change lives.
Yesterday was one of those days. I didn't want to go to our home community; sip on tea, snack on dessert and engage in conversation while personal, intimate details from the lives of our friends are shared. I wanted to open a box of cookies from Trader Joe's and watch a movie with Matt, preferably in sweatpants. Our pastor, sensing our group's lowered morale, had asked a friend of his to join us for the night and share part of his story. He is a fellow church planter in Longbeach, which is known for it's rough-around-the-edges environment. Or to be blunt: for being ghetto. He is a few years ahead of us in the church planting game so he shared with us a few things he's learned. He sat in the middle seat of the L-shaped couch in a living room full of people and while mostly looking at the floor, opened up to us about the things he and his family have been through over the past few years. His stories brought laughter, tears, sympathetic noises and "amens" from almost every person circled up around him. Mostly because it is easy to identify with his experience: church planting is hard. Beyond that, I was moved by his simple yet captivating summary; planting a church is all about Jesus. Ministry is all about Jesus. We should be all about Jesus. Again, the simplicity of it is obvious. And I won't speak for everyone in that room but I feel comfortable assuming that we all felt ministered to by him. It's so easy to be pulled to and fro by the ups and downs of a new ministry, a new group and a new city. It's even easier to start working from within, trying to take control of things and accomplish them yourself.
He had nothing new or flashy to say to us. He wasn't holding a church-planting secret or offering us something we didn't know. He didn't rattle off Scripture or attach his story to men from the Bible. He shrugged, lifted his head and reminded us why we were sitting in that living room in the first place. We love and believe in Jesus and his ability to change lives.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)